Marriage Devotional Day 11:  Love Beyond Dishpan Hands

For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault.  Ephesians 5:25-27

Love your green beans. Love your job. Love your dog. But sacrifice for your wife. Lose yourself. Become last. In that way, your wife becomes all you pray for her and who God created her to be.
If a husband’s deepest need is respect, then a wife’s is surely to know she is loved. And not in a physical way or a romantic dinner kind of way or even in a ‘wow, you are really an amazing mom' way – but in a manner that communicates sacrifice. Waiving our ‘rights’ to think about ourselves first is counter-intuitive to human nature, but it’s a moment that reveals security and love to a wife’s heart.
This seems almost out of reach for a lot of men. We think doing the dishes, watching the kids, or bringing home a steady paycheck communicates to our spouses the place they hold in our hearts and lives. Helping a wife sense how loved she is goes beyond vacuum cleaners and auto bill pay.
Read Ephesians 5:21-33
The sacrifice depicted in this passage is a relinquishing of authority and position to help the bride know who she is and who she should become. Jesus released his kingship to communicate that. It was a most intimate relegation of who he was.
Love is communicated to a wife when her husband forsakes what is natural to him for her sake. In our marriage, it’s when I truly hear my wife. I shut off the television, my laptop, my phone… my inner dialogue…and tune in to her with intent and focus. And when I actually engage in the conversation, offering my point of view or honoring hers, nothing says ‘I love you’ better to her.
The love of a Savior provided security forever for the Bride of Christ. The same is true for your bride.

For her: Tell him what speaks ‘love’ to your heart – tangible moments that he’ll recognize – so he can be more mindful of those moments.

For him: She just gave you a target to aim for. Fire a shot – right now – and look for other opportunities this week to convey your love for her in a way that speaks to her.

For us: Consider reading ‘The Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman. It’s a great identifier of ways to tangibly communicate love for one another.






Used by permission.  Cornerstone Christian Fellowship