Marriage Devotional Day 26 - Did the Wiring Get Crossed?

“‘God made them male and female.’ And he said, ‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.”
Matthew 19:6

It’s a true mystery, one that trips us all up at times. We wonder why God made men and women so opposite, especially with regard to sex! Most men think about sex on a more regular basis. Even though this is true for many women as well, it’s not one of the first things on a woman’s mind. You may have heard the analogy that men are like microwaves and women are like slow cookers: it can take a man just seconds to get in the mood, while it can take some women longer to heat up.
Men are visual: their sexual appetites are activated by what they see. While women are visual as well, they are wired more emotionally: their appetite stimulated by what appeals to their heart and feelings will usually come first.
Sometimes it feels like a colossal joke, but God knew what He was doing. It wasn’t an accident, we are different by design! God designed us uniquely to portray different facets of who He is: while both can exemplify all aspects of God, men, more naturally, display strength and bravery, while women exemplify beauty and elegance.
So why did God create sex? For procreation and pleasure, yes, but also so that we would learn to truly love one another—to deny ourselves and put our spouse’s needs above our own.
The world has perverted sex and made it selfish, but God designed it as an exercise in selflessness. Since God made us so opposite, we must learn to love, communicate and sacrifice for each other.
Husbands, compliment your wives, make your wife feel beautiful. When she feels pursued, cherished and noticed, she will become more willing to accept your sexual approach and offer her beauty to you. Women long to know they are cared about and appreciated. They hate feeling invisible or worse—like your maid or a call girl. Your wife wants to know that you are pursuing her heart, not just her body.
Wives, what would it look like for you to pursue and accept sexual intimacy from your husband? For men, sex not only provides physical pleasure, but is a comforting place of love and acceptance, and, as his wife, you are the only person who can provide that safe place for him! Men are deeply impacted when faced with repeated rejection, especially in the bedroom.
You have a choice to make: you can be frustrated about the ways you are different from your spouse or you can learn to appreciate them. Let those wires go ahead and cross in the bedroom and enjoy the fireworks!

For her: How can I take pleasure in meeting my husband’s desires?
For him: How can I pursue my wife’s heart and make her feel beautiful and loved today?
For us: How can we draw closer
through sex within the next 24 hours

Used by permission.  Cornerstone Christian Fellowship